Reflection on a Turbulent Year

Every year on New Year’s Eve, I write a letter to myself at the end of the next year. It’s a prayer of sorts; a way for me to think about who I want to be and what I want for myself throughout the year.

On New Year’s Eve 2021, I wrote, “I hope you remember that you’re not perfect, and that is an incredible thing about you. That your work is not the most important or most interesting part of you. I hope that along the way, you will be held by your people. That you will be carried by those who love you most.”

I had no idea at the time, but that’s exactly what happened. 2022 was the most challenging year of my life. The highs were high and the lows were low, and I was pushed to my absolute limits.

I received several health diagnoses that I’m still learning to manage and balance.

A relationship with a person I saw a future with ended.

A close friendship came to a really painful end.

I left a job that I loved (and eventually returned).

I traveled to new places with dear, dear friends.

I experienced some of the most beautiful places this world has to offer. And there’s still so much more to explore.

Through it all, I learned:

The importance of routine, self-compassion, and surrounding yourself with people who tell you the truth and have your back.

To assess my energy and know when I can push myself and when I need to rest.

That sometimes the thing you’re afraid of does happen, and I am okay. I will be okay.

There is good to be found everywhere. There are kind doctors that breathe hope and life into you. Trees. Golden retrievers. Nutella. Highland Park. People who hold you.

I’m grateful for who I’ve become and what I’ve gained this year. For my people who carried me. For all of the joy and fun new experiences I had.

When I think of the Katie Grace at the end of 2023, I hope for her that she has experienced what it feels like to be grounded. To have her feet firmly planted and be exactly where she is. That she experiences new joy and remembers to cling to the good, because it’s everywhere and it’s just waiting to be found.